is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
