Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
