There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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