Where did you get a picture of my penis
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize