I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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