He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
