It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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