you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
So apparently I’m into choking now
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize