but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
