Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
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