turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Randomize
