We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Randomize
