i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
