Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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