honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize
