I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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