So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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