you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
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