I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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