Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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