By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I just blew my weed a kiss
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
