You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
We had to coat check the pizza.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Randomize
