He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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