It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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