so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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