I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
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