so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
