I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
...so i touched it.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
