you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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