That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
