I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
