did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
wakey wakey hands off snakey
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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