It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Randomize
