whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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