every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
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