I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
