My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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