Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
