Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
