I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Randomize
