just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
