Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
