we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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