his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
My vagina is officially offended.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
