Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Randomize