update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
