We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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