I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
