If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I licked your asshole in confidence.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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