I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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