Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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