We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
