So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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